Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Lord I'm not okay
I've been caring more than I say
I told my heart to make it through
Now I don't know what it became
I kept telling myself
This would pass someday
Now I still come to you
But I don't feel the same
[Verse 2]
It hurts that I can pray
But still feel far from you
I know you haven't left
But I don't feel close to you
[Chorus]
Lord I'm not okay
But I'm still here
I'm barely holding on
But I'm still reaching for you
My faith is small tonight
But it still belongs to you
Lord I'm not okay
But don't let go of me
[Verse 3]
I've been keeping all these questions
Till they settled in my chest
I keep doing what I have to
But my soul is needing rest
I've been calling it patience
When it's closer to fear
Still waiting for an answer
While you feel far from here
[Chorus]
And that's what scares me Lord
Not the pain but what it does
How I learned to keep on moving
But forgot how to trust
So if my heart is getting tired
Touching before it closes
If my hope is almost gone
Find the place where I lost it
Lord I'm not okay
But I'm still here
I'm barely holding on
But I'm still reaching for you
My faith is small tonight
But it still belongs to you
Lord I'm not okay
But don't let go of me
[Bridge]
I don't wanna wake up one day
And not know who I became
I don't wanna call it healing
When I've only buried pain
I don't wanna lose the softness
Just from carrying too much weight
Stay close in this moment
Till my heart can feel your grace
[Chorus]
Lord I'm not okay
But I'm still here
Not with perfect faith
Just enough to keep you near
My faith is small tonight
But it still belongs to you
Lord I'm not okay
But don't let go of me
Video
Meaning & Inspiration
The song gives language to faith under emotional strain. Its speaker admits exhaustion, distance, fear, and unanswered questions without pretending that trust feels easy. The repeated confession that faith is small but still belongs to God presents perseverance as a quiet act of dependence rather than a display of certainty. The plea not to be released holds lament and devotion together.
Images of buried pain, a tired heart, lost hope, and the need for rest keep the reflection grounded in vulnerability. The request for God to stay close echoes biblical prayers voiced from distress, while the desire to recover trust points toward grace rather than self-reliance. The song does not resolve every question; instead, it portrays prayer itself as evidence that hope remains. Its central movement is from honest admission toward continued surrender, making the lyric a meditation on seeking God when comfort and confidence seem remote.
Related Scripture
- Psalm 13:1-2 The psalm voices distress at feeling forgotten or distant from God.
- Mark 9:24 A plea for help joins imperfect faith with continued trust.