Verse 1
I just need some time, I'm tryna think straight
I just need a moment in my own space
Ask me how I'm doin', I'll say "okay," yeah
But ain't that what we all say?
Sometimes I think back to the old days
In the pointless conversations with the old me
Yeah, back when my momma used to hold me
I wish somebody woulda told me
Chorus
If you want love, you gon' have to go through the pain
If you want love, you gon' have to learn how to change
If you want trust, you gon' have to give some away
If you want love, if you want love
Verse 2
Look, as a kid I used to think life
Is moving so slow, I watch it go by
Look out the window on my bus ride
I thought the world was so small, through my closed eyes
I've always tried to control things
In the end that's what controls me
Maybe that's why I'm controllin'
I wish somebody woulda told me
Chorus
If you want love, you gon' have to go through the pain
If you want love, you gon' have to learn how to change
If you want trust, you gon' have to give some away
If you want love, if you want love
Verse 3
The older I get, I feel like I'm always tryna save time
Talkin' to the voices in my head, they make me think twice
Tellin' me it doesn't mean it's wrong because it feels right
I'm scared that one day I wake up and wonder where the time go
Talk about the past like it's the present while I rock slow
I'll sit in the living room and laugh with kids of my own
And tell 'em
Chorus
If you want love, you gon' have to go through the pain
I wish you woulda told me
If you want love, you gon' have to learn how to change
I wish somebody woulda told me
If you want trust, you gon' have to give some away
You gon' have to give
If you want love, if you want love
If you want love, if you want love
If You Want Love
If You Want Love Song Meaning, Biblical Reference and Inspiration
The song "If You Want Love" by NF, released with a video on December 7, 2018, presents a raw and introspective exploration of personal struggles, growth, and the demanding nature of genuine connection. The narrative unfolds through verses that capture moments of vulnerability and reflection, contrasting past innocence with present complexities. The opening verse immediately establishes a tone of internal contemplation, with the artist seeking mental clarity and personal space. He touches on the common human tendency to mask feelings with a simple "okay" and reflects on childhood, recalling a time of maternal comfort and wishing for guidance that wasn't received. This sets the stage for the song's central theme: the lessons learned (or wishing he had learned) about life and relationships.
The chorus serves as the core message, presenting a stark, almost challenging, truth about the pursuit of love and trust. It asserts that acquiring love necessitates enduring pain and undergoing personal change. Similarly, building trust requires reciprocity, emphasizing the need to give some away to receive it. This repeated mantra acts as a foundational principle, suggesting that these desirable emotional states are not passively obtained but are earned through active participation, vulnerability, and transformation. It reframes love and trust not just as feelings, but as outcomes of difficult processes.
Moving into the second verse, the artist delves deeper into past perspectives, recalling the slow passage of time as a child and a limited view of the world. A significant theme introduced here is the struggle with control. He admits to a lifelong attempt to control external circumstances, only to realize this drive itself becomes a controlling force over him. This internal conflict is linked back to a wish for prior knowledge, reiterating the idea that certain life lessons are learned the hard way. This reflection on control ties into the broader theme of change presented in the chorus, suggesting that relinquishing control might be part of the necessary personal transformation.
The final verse reflects on the passage of time from an older perspective, highlighting a constant effort to save time while simultaneously being influenced by internal voices that challenge intuition. There's a palpable sense of anxiety about the future and the speed at which life passes, leading to a longing for a future moment of comfort and reflection – specifically, sharing these hard-won lessons with his own children. The song culminates with the chorus repeated, reinforced by the poignant interjection "I wish you woulda told me" and "I wish somebody woulda told me," underlining the personal significance and the difficulty of the journey described. The closing lines of the chorus are repeated, emphasizing the demanding conditions for love and trust as the ultimate takeaway from the introspection.