Jars of Clay - Mirrors & Smoke Lyrics
Lyrics
I'm feeling older than my years
I'm feeling pain inside my chest
It's love that keeps me silent
It's my silence you detest
Rivers flow into the oceans
And oceans never fill
I want to kiss your lips
But I know I never will
Love's a hard decision to risk impending choke
My love will keep you wishing
And my heart will keep me broke
I give you flowers
Give you candy to even out the guilt
I send you greeting cards
With messages that I could never write
Rivers flow into the oceans
And oceans never fill
I want to let you know me
But I know I never will
Love's a contradiction
Many mirrors and smoke
My love will keep you wishing
My heart makes me broke
You will always want me
And I'll always want to leave
Even though I cut your wounds
You still deny they're real
Rivers flow into the oceans
Oceans never fill
I want to lay my life down
But I know you never will
Love's a strange condition
With all the doubts it can invoke
Your love keeps me wishing
My heart keeps me broke
Baby, don't you cry,
'Cause I got it all figured out
You always make me sad
But that's what true love is all about
Rivers never fill the oceans
But oceans always feel
The waters reaching deep inside them
I guess they always will
Love's a constant mission
Truer words were never spoke
My love it keeps you wishing
My heart, it keeps me broke
Love's a constant mission
Truer words were never spoke
My love it keeps you wishing
My heart, it keeps me broke
Mirrors and smoke (it keeps you wishing)
My heart keeps me broke
Mirrors and smoke
Mirrors and smoke
Video
Mirrors & Smoke
Meaning & Inspiration
Jars of Clay's "Mirrors & Smoke," released on March 19, 2007, as a standout track from their album *Good Monsters*, plunges listeners into the often murky and painful waters of a profoundly conflicted relationship. The song immediately captures a sense of weariness, with the opening lines painting a picture of internal struggle and emotional fatigue, hinting at a love that is both desired and dreaded. At its core, the narrative explores the paradox of a connection characterized by unfulfilled longing and a profound inability to fully embrace or be embraced. The speaker articulates a yearning for intimacy – to kiss, to be known, to lay down their life – yet is repeatedly met with the stark realization, "I know I never will" or "I know you never will." This recurring sentiment underscores a deep-seated brokenness and a resistance to authentic vulnerability, manifested in the acts of giving "flowers" and "candy" not out of pure affection, but "to even out the guilt," a poignant admission of emotional deficit. The central metaphor of "mirrors and smoke" perfectly encapsulates this obscured reality, where clarity is elusive, truth is distorted, and genuine connection is hindered by illusions and self-deception. The painful acknowledgment, "You will always want me, and I'll always want to leave," lays bare the inescapable tension and perhaps even a pattern of self-sabotage that perpetuates the cycle of yearning and disappointment for both parties.
While on the surface, "Mirrors & Smoke" navigates the complexities of human romantic love, Jars of Clay's spiritual depth invites a profound interpretation through a faith-based lens. The consistent declaration, "my heart will keep me broke," resonates deeply with the biblical understanding of our fallen human condition, a heart that is often prone to self-destruction and incapable of perfect love on its own. Scripture reminds us that a truly broken spirit and a contrite heart are what the Lord does not despise (Psalm 51:17), and He is close to the brokenhearted, saving those crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). This song lays bare that inner brokenness, and for the believer, it points to the divine Physician who heals and restores. The image of "rivers flow into the oceans and oceans never fill" powerfully illustrates humanity's unquenchable thirst for ultimate satisfaction, a longing that worldly loves and pursuits can never truly fulfill. Just as the psalmist yearns for God "as a deer pants for streams of water" (Psalm 42:1), our spiritual oceans remain unfillable until they are met with the living water that Christ offers, which "will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life" (John 4:14).
The metaphor of "mirrors and smoke" gains even deeper significance when viewed through the spiritual journey. It echoes the apostle Paul's words in 1 Corinthians 13:12, "For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known." Our earthly perception of truth, of God, and even of ourselves, is often obscured by the smoke of sin, doubt, and our limited human understanding. This spiritual fog can lead to the very denial of wounds the song describes, where we might refuse to acknowledge our spiritual brokenness or the pain our choices inflict upon our relationship with God. The line, "Baby, don't you cry, 'Cause I got it all figured out, You always make me sad, But that's what true love is all about," when stripped of its potentially cynical human interpretation, can be remarkably profound in a spiritual context. True love, as exemplified by Christ, *did* involve immense sorrow and sacrifice. For Jesus, loving humanity meant enduring the cross, a profound sadness and brokenness that ultimately led to redemption and joy. "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends" (John 15:13). This perspective reframes the idea of love as a "constant mission," not a mission of self-preserving brokenness, but one of self-giving, cruciform love that transforms both the giver and receiver.
The subtle shift in the later verses, "Rivers never fill the oceans, But oceans always feel the waters reaching deep inside them," offers a glimmer of enduring hope. Even if our human capacity for perfect love remains incomplete, and our hearts often feel unfillable, there is a constant, persistent presence of divine love reaching into the deepest parts of our being. This speaks to God's unwavering faithfulness and His ceaseless pursuit of us, even when we are prone to leave or deny the reality of our condition. "The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: 'I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness'" (Jeremiah 31:3). Ultimately, "Mirrors & Smoke" serves as a powerful and introspective piece, revealing the inherent struggles of human connection and the persistent brokenness within us. Yet, by inviting us to look beyond the surface, it subtly points to the transformative power of God's perfect love, a love that offers clarity where there is smoke, and healing for every broken heart, urging us to step out from behind our own distorting mirrors and into His brilliant truth.